As you become comfortable in your relationship with a partner, those edges between you that initially were full of excitement, energy and potentiality, begin to cool. The qualities that thrilled and enticed you before, can become mild annoyances and irritations....

“How was your day?” Recently I was asked about this question and whether there were other ways of engaging with a partner after a time apart. It’s a question we don’t often examine.  Although the original intention was to create connection, you may have...

Are you aware of your “havingness level,” how much you are willing to receive before the sensation of all that goodness feels like too much? Without an awareness to some of the factors that limit how much goodness you can take in and stay conscious for, you will...

Over 20 years ago, after a very messy, painful, and contentious #divorce I found myself in a new relationship.  I was the fittest, happiest, and most fulfilled I had been in my life up to that point.  I felt for sure, this new relationship would be a...

Years ago, I had a client who came to me looking for a relationship.  In our sessions, she confided that men hit on her quite often, but rarely wanted more than sex.  One afternoon she went clothes shopping with some girlfriends.  One of her...

It is customary for clients who seek out my relationship coaching support to have either thin boundaries with others (difficulty saying no) or overcompensate with thick boundaries (avoiding intimacy and close relationships).  The dominant culture trains us to see...

Over the last year, I’ve experienced several family losses. Interestingly, many in my circles are having similar experiences and yet relationship grief is not dinner conversation. It is not a topic we are culturally taught to connect over, at the water fountain, over...

When my son was a teenager, we visited the Groeninge Museum in Bruges. There he was introduced to the art Hieronymus Bosch. Intrigued by the images of hell and damnation, he asked me to buy him a postcard of the Last Judgement. In three gory panels, it depicts God...

I’m off to the UK today for my aunt’s funeral.  This is on the heels of unexpectedly losing my Father, her only sibling, in August and placing both my parents in a nursing home last April.  My mother is no longer compos mentis so that, too, feels a...