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Don’t get caught in the monkey trap

We are full swing into the month of Love….

In Jon Kabat-Zinn’s book “Full Catastrophe Living,” is a tale of clever monkey-catching techniques from India.  Hunters carve a hole in the coconut just large enough for a monkey’s hand, then wire it to a tree placing a banana inside.  The monkey, enticed by the fruit, slips in its hand and is trapped by its fist gripping the banana.  All it must do to escape is release the fruit, yet most monkeys cling stubbornly.

When it comes to relationship dynamics, our own human mind often falls into similar traps despite our intelligence.  Attachment is innate, yet sometimes the very things we cling to hold us back, causing us undue pain.

So, what’s the solution?

Neuroplasticity suggests that 80% of the time we operate from old patterns. Our brain seeks efficiency and conserves energy by automating our familiar behaviors.  It’s a cycle we’ve all experienced countless times, allowing us more leisure in activities like watching “Ted Lasso.”

The last 15 years of neuroscience research underscores the brain’s remarkable capacity for change, regardless of age or circumstance.

According to Brian Lipton, author of “The Biology of Belief”, external influences impact cellular membranes more significantly than genetics. Limiting beliefs, stories, and behavioral patterns across generations, explained by epigenetics, is simply the brain being efficient. 

Until someone, AKA you, steps in to make a different choice.

When it comes to unhelpful relationship dynamics, the power to change lies within us – no matter our age or circumstance.

As we head toward Valentine’s day, with the commodification of romance as the great profit strategy, will your approach change the way you relate or will you cling to your familiar banana? 

If you sense Your Love by Design is a fit, CLICK HERE now so we can chat about what this is meant to be for you.

I so look forward to you experiencing the kind of Love you could never imagine.

May Love be your decision today, always, and in all ways,

Joëlle