518-727-5458 joelle@joellelydon.com

The Way to Love, by design

There is much hype on social media about what is needed to REALLY succeed in relationships.  I hear about how overwhelming this is every time I connect with a new potential client for the Your Love by Design Training Programs.

I get it because, one, we are adorably human in our tendency toward complicating things; and two, there’s a lot of relationship quick fix crap out there that is all about providing information without the way to create transformation.  It’s truly unfortunate.

When we are equipped with the knowledge, foundational tools and accountability, we are best able to create long lasting real Love.. by Design. As your Heart Coach, I’m thrilled to share my unique approach with you.

What it takes to create real lasting Love:

  • The phases
    • Preparation
    • Honeymoon
    • Uncertainty
    • Adjustment
    • Commitment
    • Real Love (rinse, rest, repeat)

  • The 7 steps
    • Build your emotional resilience
    • Untangle past patterns from present needs
    • Trust as your new normal
    • Follow the compass of your heart
    • The gift of your devotion
    • Lift the weight of the world off your shoulders
    • Leave a legacy of Love
    • Rinse, rest, repeat

The 4 Phases of Relationship

  • Preparation – being ready and willing to create a genuine connection with another
  • Commitment – being willing to move through the romantic phase into the “I’m in”
  • Recommitment– being willing to remain connected through friction and conflict over and again.
  • Long-lasting Real Love – being willing to consciously being action with the first 3 phases – for a rinse, rest, and repeat.  

These 4 phases are foundational to both navigating the early stages as well as the ongoing growth of your relationship and can be expanded to meet the needs of all your relationships (romantic or otherwise.)

That’s it. 

Our brain will tend toward complicating matters by default which is why it’s always both an inner and outer process when it comes to creating Real Love.  This means it’s about being in process through the 4 phases awhile regulating our nervous system’s reaction to taking the actions needed.

That is why in the Your Love by Design Training Programs we account for 7 stages of relational growth within the phases themselves: each with a deliberately designed curriculum of trainings that teach you the WHAT outer actions to take for each phase so you can continuously bypass fear, doubt, anxiety and  overwhelm and stay committed to the health and development of your relationships long term.

7 steps circle

The 7 Stages of Your Love by Design

When you first enroll into Your Love by Design program, you receive a welcome packet with assessments to help clarify where you are in your relational journey.  Together we review your answers to begin the process of setting intentions and outcomes for your program.

Here is a brief description of each of the Seven Stages of Your Love by Design Program:

Step 1: Build Your Emotional Resilience

First, we must move your nervous system out of its hyper-vigilant fight-flight-freeze-fawn state into a rest-restore-rejuvenate setting.  This is where calm, not anxiety nor fear, becomes your new relational setting.

Step 2: Untangle Past Patterns from Present Need

Overcoming relationship stuckness is NOT about mastering willpower, becoming someone else or settling for less than you deserve.  In this phase of your journey, you develop trust, so you confidently and consistently make choices that are aligned rather than deplete or frustrate you. 

Step 3: Trust as your New Normal

Stop believing and cycling through unhelpful thoughts and relationships get easier, more connected, fulfilling.    No matter what is going on around you, you can trust yourself to handle it with Grace.

Step 4: Follow the Compass of your Heart

From personal experience with healing my own relational wounds and over a decade of research in Relationship Science, I’ve identified that what our minds and our hearts will take us on very distinct paths when it comes to Love.   In our work together, we lead with the heart so you can truly be free from attracting mismatched partners.

lead with the heart so you can truly be free from attracting mismatched partners.

Step 5: The Gift of your Devotion

What you resist, persists. That’s why the pattern of mismatched relationship is a cycle. The way to break this cycle is NOT to resist change. This is where your devotion to setting parameters becomes your greatest advocate and teacher, a wellspring for deep wisdom, a gift from the Universe for your deepest liberation, and a most profound and loving connection.  

Step 6: Lift the Weight of the World from your Shoulders

You have your own Divine Timing when it comes to Love.  This is why together we co-create your own unique approach to dating (if you’re single) or partnership (if you’re coupled) that integrates the upgraded ways of thinking, feeling and being that support you in honoring your own pace with a sense of legitimacy and worth to feel peace.

Step 7: Leave a legacy of Love

With Trust as your new normal, committed to be a stand for Love, friction and conflict are natural occurrences in your relationships.  Redefining those sticky areas between you as new challenges to work on, allows you to take your relationship to the next level, Leaving a Legacy of Love. 

Step 8: Rinse, Rest, Repeat

Just as we bathe regularly to keep healthy hygiene, it’s important to continue and consistently work these steps again and again to keep healthy mental and emotional hygiene in our relationships. It’s not about going back to the beginning or repeating first grade. It’s about moving to your advanced levels of inner trust, so your choices and actions meet the evolving needs of your relationship. This is the path to mastery. 

A Unique element to the programs

Aside from considering the 4 phases of relationship and the 7 stages for creating Your Love by Design, one of the most unique components I’ve weaved into your program is brain-based, intuitive, creative processes that require no artistic ability.

In my decades long studies in Expressive Arts and Intentional Creativity, I’ve learned the value of using creativity to unleash the power of the unconscious into conscious insight and action, learning how to direct its relational power to really work FOR you rather than against you. It changes your life.

The trainings in your program include creative processes that change EVERYTHING about how you be, do and relate, everything.

These are just a few of the powerful processes we have in the program:

  • SoulCollage
  • Polarity Squares
  • Orphan Rescue process
  • Future Self Visioning process
  • …and much more

The Way Forward

When you learn to apply these specifically tailored to you coaching and accountability and practical trainings with creativity, you’ll find your relational trust and confidence grow. And, seriously will not believe what starts to show up “out of the blue” (a partner, if you’re single; more intimacy and connection if you’re coupled). I’ve seen it so many times, I’ve stopped counting.

No matter where you are in your relationship phase, and no matter what you are looking to create – suddenly it begins to come to fruition with so you find yourself doing less, receiving more and achieving a greater impact in all your relationships.

If you sense Your Love by Design is a fit for you, CLICK HERE now so we can chat about what this is meant to be for you.

I so look forward to you experiencing the kind of Love you could never imagine.

May Love be your decision today, always, and in all ways,