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The Paradox of Attraction

In the dance of relationships, there’s a phenomenon that often unfolds like a complex puzzle of intentions and perceptions.

Picture this: you believe you are broadcasting a readiness, an “open for connection” energy.  Meanwhile your signals, unbeknownst to you, communicate “enter at your own risk.” 

20 years back, in the throes of divorce and after, I found myself at this exact spot wondering why no one seemed interested. I found myself in an adorable place where my energy created a contradiction. 

One who seems to say, “Come closer, let’s connect,” while underneath, whispering, “I’m a minefield, tread carefully” can be confusing.  And a confused mind always says NO. 

What gives?

1. Past Echoes, Present Sentinels: Echoes of past heartaches can cast shadows on your present readiness.  
2. Desire for Connection: The desire to connect can blur your true intentions. You might intend to be approachable and open, yet the fear of rejection keeps your defenses active and at play.
3. Embracing Vulnerability: Genuine connection requires vulnerability, which can be daunting.

For potential partners, the mixed message of perceived energy and actual emotional availability poses a challenge. Misinterpreting signals can breed confusion when they land on the subtle “enter at your own risk” message beneath the warm exterior.

As a Relationship Coach, I encourage my clients to embark on an inward journey of self-discovery and alignment. By recognizing these dual energies they work towards the changes needed to authentically mirror their intentions. Through self-awareness, open communication, and gradual vulnerability, you can bridge the gap between the energies you emit and the messages you wish to convey.

In so doing you get to stand in your desire with a sense of legitimacy.

My mission is to guide clients in navigating these subtle shifts with courage, wisdom, self-compassion, and a commitment. This fosters an authentic connection where Love gets to be the decision each and every day.