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When the Risk To Remain in Bud feels Greater than the Risk To Blossom

The pain of making a change must become less than the pain of staying in the current situation.” Chris Guillebeau, The Art of Non Conformity

Ever since discovering Anais Nin’s quote, “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom” about 12 years ago, I have unknowingly (and perhaps, knowingly) held onto this belief.  Although the communities I spend my time in don’t ascribe to this credo,  it has set up camp in my thinking: in order for any change to occur, the circumstance has to be worse than the risk it takes to a leap into the great unknown.

It keeps one waiting.  Waiting for that “sweet spot” of discomfort that would finally fuel action.  Waiting for the pressure to become so intense  no other recourse than, as Pema Chodron says, to “Never underestimate our inclination to bolt when we hurt” seems possible.

How many of you have been waiting? Saying to yourselves:

“When will I have the courage?”

Do I have the courage?”

“Do I have what it takes?”

Followed by:

“You can’t make it.”

“You’re not good enough.”

“This is as good as it gets.”

“Suck it up.”

It keeps you stuck longer, looking for the courage it would take to leap and trust that whatever were to happen, you’d be safe.  It’s a mental construct – one in which we can find ourselves endlessly wheeling around in like a hamster for EVER.

What if you questioned this belief?  What if, rather than wait for the “risk to remain in bud” to be so intense in order drive your desire to change, you focused on the desire to blossom instead?

What if you shifted your perspective?   

What if you decided that you were worth more?  Worthy of a better job, worthy of a better partnership, a better lover, worthy of better friendships, worthy of a healthier body.  This, sisters, is a shift of the greatest kind:

From obsessing (a mental form of bolting) to being attracted and drawn toward.

From tight and constricted to unfurled and open.

From holding on, to letting go.

From zero sum, to endless possibility.

All your actions, all of your decisions, would come from a place of self-love, from a desire to expand.  You would focus on blossoming so that the job, the relationship, the eating habit is no longer satisfactory.  You are worth so much more.  This decision creates space – for new ideas, strategies, creativity, love, YOU.

Time to blossom, don’t you think?

I’d love to hear from you.  What did it take for you to take your great leaps?   Do you have specific tools to share with us?

P.S. While this material doesn’t cost you a cent, I am building my Right Livelihood, after all.  So all I ask from you is to share this article with at least 3 friends.  Fair trade, right? xoxo


2 Responses to “When the Risk To Remain in Bud feels Greater than the Risk To Blossom”

  1. Buffy says:

    Wonderful! This Anias Nin quote has been one of my favorites for a long time. Not only to I feel that it gives a subtle permission to blossom…but that it also honors the timing it takes to blossom. Your shifts in perspective are the perfect food/fertilizer for supporting the process.

    • Joëlle says:

      Honoring the time it takes to blossom. Yes – each of us are on our own natural time in that regard. Thank you for the beautiful reminder. xoxo Joëlle

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