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Powerful Questions – some noticings…

I haven’t finished this module yet, and the topic has been on my mind the entire week. I have been questioning the questions I ask not just of my clients, my friends, my coworkers, but those I ask of myself. This has required an awareness of self-awareness, and an awareness of my active listening. What I am beginning to notice is that the heart and art of being a coach lies not only in listening to the client, but to myself as I listen.

I notice that, sometimes, I have given advice – when I believe to have an “answer” to my client’s dilemma.

I notice that when I do that, even in mid-sentence, I am aware that this is not my role and have had difficulty backtracking – wishing there were a way of opening my mouth and letting all of the words that just spilled out, to spill back in – and wish I had chosen to pause instead. I am not beating myself up over this process, lest you believe I am. I recognize that as I practice, I am developing, fine-tuning, sensing, and rewiring in order to truly do this work with integrity.

I notice that, yesterday and this morning in particular with both of my clients, I caught myself wishing to give suggestions/ask a directed question. In both cases, I was able to tune into right-knowing and into myself, ask myself whether the suggestion/question was coming from my ego or from the process itself, and to begin to discern what was in my client’s highest good.

I notice, I am learning.

I notice that, sometimes, I am moved to do something I have not “thought” of myself, but seems to come through me in the process of coaching.

I notice that I trust those impulses as something that has to be asked at that moment.

I notice that this is usually the right action for me to take. My clients validate this, and show me that they are infinitely resourceful.

I notice that the more I trust myself and the process, the more powerful my coaching can become -staying laser focused on the client while remaining self-aware is the key to my success.

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