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Letting Go of Emotional Clutter

This journey called life is amazing. Some of us are already equipped with our internal GPS, equipment and end destination – others are grasping at a vague sense of direction. Either way, the challenges we meet along the way can slow us down, cause detours and even grind us into a halt.

Emotional clutter holds the same kind of power: keeping us stuck, draining us of any sense of pleasure. Here are some tips to deal with your emotional clutter – to find ease and joy into journey.

1. Clutter?  What clutter?  You mean I’m not supposed to feel this way?

This is the fun part.  Let you itty bitty whiny committee have a say.  Make a list of all your gripes, moans, fears, anxieties, complaints, anger, anything that springs to mind. Don’t hold back. Give yourself plenty of time to make this list and be truly honest.

The point here is to identify and create an awareness, not swim around in a negative cesspool, so that we can shine a light onto it. If you do find yourself taking a cesspool dip, take a dance break, go for a walk, bench press your toddler and come back to the list later on.

2. Flip it!  Flip it Good!

This is the first part of freeing the negativity. Take each one of your gripes and flip it on it’s back.  For example, your gripe could be: “I don’t have enough time for me.”  A Flip might read: “Because I am in control of my time,  I choose to plan a pleasurable activity into my schedule each and every day.”   It is easy to get bogged down in the past.  Focus on how the clutter is showing itself up in your life now and what you can do to make the change. Keep your language positive and always stating what it is you desire.

It does not matter if it seems to be in the realm of fantasy.  Taking a new action will always feel awkward at first.  Just go with it for now.

Congratulations!  You’ve just created your  ‘What Do I Want?’ list. Treasure it. You will be adding to it and using it to build more positivity.

3. How do you get to Carnegie Hall?

It would be lovely if we could all stop at #2.  Not happening…  You have to follow up with a way to make it happen.  So, go back to your ‘What Do I Want?’ list, look at each flipped item in turn and ask yourself this question:

“In order to fully release my negative feelings and embrace the positive intention that’s here, what action steps can I begin to take?”

It’s important to understand that it doesn’t mean that you ‘have’ to do something it just means that you ‘could’ do it. It’s about seeing all the possibilities. It’s about opening up the door, and sticking your candle in the crack.

Some of the things that may show up for you could be entirely practical, others more emotional. For example:

  • write a letter of forgiveness
  • hire a life coach
  • join a meditation group
  • look at yourself in the mirror and, heart open, declare your love
  • ask for help

What you are going after for is a sense of relief.  Just the action thought creates an opening.

This step alone may generate a sense of renewed energy – giving you the impetus to look forward, think big, leave no stone unturned.

4.  Lights, Camera, Action!

Just imagining all the ways that we can begin to make change, can declutter our emotions and make us feel more positive. Actually dreaming what’s possible can ignite our courage to make change and take action. But where to start?  You could ask yourself:

  • Which item on your list could you do first?
  • Which item on your list could be the easiest to do?
  • Which item on your list could be the most powerful to do?
  • Take the steps you need to start making yourself feel better.
Or just launch and learn…

5.  Become a scientist

Of course when we make change that is new, the old itty bitty whiny committee is going to pay a visit – looking to keep you stuck.  I invite you to do put on your white lab coat and stethoscope.  Become a scientist.  Adopt the perspective that you are just doing research.  It’s not serious.  You are collecting data.

By becoming an impartial observer of your emotions as you make change, you will gain greater insight into yourself and be better able to let things go as negative emotions release their grip on you.  So, mentally detach from the situation; stand on the outside of yourself and observe how you are feeling, what you are doing and how you are interacting.

And, especially when you goof up (when we are learning new things, we all do), examine how the situation could be done differently the next time.  Acknowledge what you learned.  Above all, keep moving in the direction of your desires.  It is what you were put on this earth to do.

Share your insights with us!  What have you done to let go of emotional clutter?

6 Responses to “Letting Go of Emotional Clutter”

  1. Lauren G says:

    Sometimes observing seems easy to do. At other times, observing seems like a chore, because I feel in it. Writing out the lists or going to an empty park and screaming at the top of my lungs always seems to help. Screaming actually works better at the beach, but its a bit farther away. I love your actions steps here. I am definitely going to put it to the test.

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