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Lessons Learned From Our Greatest Fear

“Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure” ~ Marianne Williamson

How would you feel if you knew the result of every action you took?  Reassured?  Happy?  Safe?  At peace?

I have spent the last month and a half putting together a tele-seminar series.  This is a first for me, EVER.  And, quite frankly, I had no clue how the whole thing was going to happen.  I just had a nudge to step into it.  All I knew was that I was being urged to step bigger into my life in some way and that I would never be the same as a result of following this guidance.

Initially, this project felt right and I navigated those waters with ease.  When it came to the practicalities of putting the website together, marketing, landing pages et cetera, Fear stepped in.  I did not know how to do these things, and now people were relying on me to pull it together.  After all they had agreed to be interviewed by me.  If I backed out, I would show myself to be the fraud I, on some level, believed myself to be.  How brilliant was I to paint myself into a corner?  I had to figure out how…

The how showed herself up in an amazing webmatrix, Anasha.  Problem solved.  Amazing how the universe works…

Then, today.  I had readied myself to interview Barbara Stanny.   In the early afternoon, she sent me an email telling me she was not feeling well. She added that although she would still be willing to do it, she would not be on top of her game.  Oh My Goddess! I did not want to force her to do something she was not up to.  Fear and panic took over as I scrambled around, sent desperate emails, called speakers, received advice, and finally settled it.  I was going to be the first speaker. (Holy shit!)  After all, this was the first in 15 tele-seminars.  People had registered. I couldn’t cancel!  What would people say????

At the last minute, again, not knowing how, Donna Otmani, who has been working with Barbara, showed up in all of her juicy glory and we had a great interview.  And so my first in my Teleseminar series began.  I learned a lot as a result: How to turn on a dime, how to rely on the power of my creative force to draw in what I need, how to feel the fear and do whatever it takes to get things done.  I guess this is what is required to step big into one’s life.

It did made me wonder what the “real” creative geniuses fear when embarking upon a new project…. and found this list written by Twyla Tharp in her book The Creative Habit.

1. People will laugh at me.

2. Someone has done it before.

3. I have nothing to say.

4. I will upset someone I love.

5. Once executed, the idea will never be as good as it is in my mind.

These statements resonated with me – especially the last one.  It is there that I trip myself each and every time.  If I could just stay focused on the outcomes of the project and stay away from needing to know how it will happen, then I could stay out of my own way.

Had I let my fear get the best of me, I would have thrown in the towel when I couldn’t pull the website “thang” together on my own.  I would have called all the women who believed and saw in me the powerhouse I couldn’t see in myself, and cancelled the whole shebang.  Instead, I asked for help (new skill here!).  Today, I could have cancelled my very first teleseminar (BECAUSE I CAN’T DO THIS!!!) and performed an amazingly colorful act of self-sabotage, disappointing all of the women whose fires could be fanned with this work.

We are taught that fear is something to avoid at all costs.  We’ve been fed a lie.  The truth is that if you are not feeling a sense of creative tension, enduring the discomfort, observing the resistance and going for it anyway, you are not stretching into your fullest potential.

What are the fears that stop you?

Recognizing and naming what holds us back from stepping big in our lives is the first place to begin.

Once you unveil the truth of the fear – it will literally begin to shrink in size and give you more space to breathe.  It will no longer have that overwhelming grip on you that can lead to a sense of paralysis.

So try it.  Try it right now.  Write down your top five fears.







Here are mine, just to be transparent (I’m not going to ask you to do something, I myself wouldn’t be willing to do):

1.  If I’m truthful, people won’t like me.

2.  I am really a fraud, and someday someone will find out.

3.  I have to do everything myself.

4.  I don’t want to appear a salesperson – you know, sleazy.

5.  If I do this, I’ll fail.


After you have written you 5 greatest fears…

Share them.

With someone you trust.  Having a witness to this process is so powerful.  You can even post them as a comment to this blog entry.  I would love to bear witness to them.

In the meantime, enjoy the journey.  Fear has the most perfect timing: showing you that you are about to place your foot on a stepping stone that will take you to the next level.  Grow Big with me.  I need playmates in the sandbox!



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